It’s a Fine Line
- nifty50s.com
- 9 hours ago
- 2 min read
Knowing when a push turns into a shove

How many times have you heard this before? “In a perfect world…” you wouldn’t have to do this; or, someone would do that for you; or, you wouldn’t find yourself in this situation… Well, news flash! This is not a perfect world. Never has been. Never will be. If you haven’t figured that out yet, as an older job seeker, you probably will soon.
Are there ways to, maybe not make it a perfect world, but at least make it so that it’s a little less imperfect? Sometimes. In a perfect world, you could wait to be properly introduced to a contact at a company at which you would like to work, or at which there is an opening that you find highly desirable.
When to pull that lever
When should you be professional and/or polite and wait for that introduction? While all situations are different, it may depend on how well (or how long) you know the person who is doing the introduction.
If it’s a long-time friend or associate, it may be better to wait. Or, to do some gentle nudging or to drop a few hints. In this situation, you don’t want to jeopardize a long-term relationship.
On the other hand, if it’s a casual acquaintance or someone you just met at a networking event, you might want to push that envelope just a tad. No matter how professional or polite you want to be, you still need a job and, if you wait too long, you may be left waiting.
Having doors opened for you is good and important, but you can’t count on it. You’re the master of your job search.
That said, there is a saying that sales people use all the time that says something like: the sales process, you can only go through it as fast as the customer wants. In the job search world, people make recommendations and companies hire in their own spaces and time. Despite your best efforts and as much as you might want to come to a resolution, you may not be able speed that process along.
In the end, you may just have to use your better judgment to determine where to draw the line between being properly aggressive and being an annoying pain in the butt. That may be one of the toughest calls of all.